Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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