Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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