Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
