Banned from zoo.
Again?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
