I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize