he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
its liver damage thursday
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize