some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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