Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
