i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
