Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
