forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
