Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
