went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize