physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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