No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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