Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize