Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Your penis caused this!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
