My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
