you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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