Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
