chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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