i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
