you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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