This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
