No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
