I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
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