yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
