we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
