loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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