It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
