Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
