Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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