so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
