Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
