Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize