My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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