whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
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