i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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