big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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