Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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