we have officially mastered the walk of shame
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
