I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
