I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
