Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
