what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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