I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
