yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
So vagazzling was a success
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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