Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
