ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
We have started to decorate penises.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Someone signed my nipple.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize