i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
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