She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize