i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize